I started serving in student ministry right after graduating from high school. The reason was simple: In middle school, I faced several personal crises. My parents’ marriage was going through a really difficult time, we had just moved several states away from everything familiar, and I was battling depression and suicidal ideation. During that season, I didn’t have the adult guidance I desperately needed. Because I vividly remember how that felt, I now want to provide that guidance for others, as well as point them to the power of the Gospel.
If you feel overwhelmed trying to support students through hard times, here are some ways to offer them Christ-centered care in their darkest moments.
Relocating: teaching stability in an unstable world
A change in address can be traumatic for students, shaking their sense of stability and disrupting their relationships. Major transitions like this are opportunities to remind students that while their surroundings and connections may change, Jesus never does.
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. Hebrews 13:8
It’s also important to help teens learn how to balance mourning what’s been lost with gratitude for what’s ahead. Reassure them that God can handle their sadness. Scriptures such as Ecclesiastes 3 remind us that every emotion has its place and time—and that grief is part of being human.
Divorce: addressing abandonment and family breakdown
Divorce often leaves students feeling confused, hurt, or abandoned. They may wonder why God allowed it or whether something is wrong with them personally. You can gently remind them that God’s heart is for reconciliation, not separation.
‘So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.’ Matthew 19:6
Help students understand that while people may fail us, God never will. When they feel isolated or jealous of the family dynamics of others, remind them that God places the lonely in families—sometimes biological, sometimes spiritual.
A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in His holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families. Psalm 68:5–6
School shootings: processing fear and the desire for justice
The tragedy of a school shooting can leave students terrified, angry, or numb. The desire for justice is real—and biblical—but we must help students resist the urge to retaliate.
Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord. Romans 12:19
As gun violence continues to affect schools, it can leave kids afraid. In those moments, you can guide them to Scripture passages like Isaiah 41, which contains verses such as:
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. Isaiah 41:10
Abuse: protecting victims and promoting healing
Abuse is one of the most difficult topics to address, but one of the most vital. Victims often feel ashamed, guilty, or responsible. Some might think the abuse is a punishment for their sins. We must be clear: Abuse is never God’s will. It stems from the brokenness and sin in the abuser’s heart.
If a student shares something that makes you suspect abuse, your first responsibility is to ensure their safety. Once they are safe, you can begin walking with them through the healing process. God can heal even the deepest wounds. And often, that healing comes through trusted professionals. Encourage students to pursue counseling, therapy, and other resources, alongside prayer and Scripture.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3
Suicide: offering hope when students can’t see tomorrow
Someone once told me: Depression and suicidal ideation are a deficiency of imagination—you can’t imagine a better future for yourself. When a student confides that they’re struggling, one of the most powerful things you can do is help them envision what’s next.
There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. Proverbs 23:18
Another heartbreaking question I sometimes hear is: Did my friend lose their salvation because they died by suicide? The answer is no. While suicide is tragic and sinful, it does not remove someone from God’s grace. If salvation depends solely on grace through faith—not our works—then no sin, even suicide, can undo it.
I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. John 10:28
Once we belong to God, we are secure in Him forever.
Your role as a guide—and a mandatory reporter
When walking students through trauma, start with prayer. Be present. Ask more questions than you give answers. Share how God has brought you through pain, and give them space to imagine a future with hope. Then, trust the Holy Spirit to do what only He can.
As a youth leader, you may also be a mandatory reporter, which means if you suspect a student is being abused or neglected, or is at risk of self-harm, you are legally required to contact the appropriate authorities. (In some states, only paid employees of an organization are mandatory reporters, but volunteers should still report the information to someone—most likely to a paid leader at the church, or to local authorities if that’s not a good option. For more guidance, you can conduct an internet search to check your state’s mandatory reporting laws.)
For students in crisis, mental health resources are essential. Stay Here is a Christian organization that offers hope and practical help for those facing suicidal thoughts.
Final thoughts
Students need more than just advice. They also need adults who are present, compassionate, and rooted in biblical truth. You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to show up, listen well, and point them to Jesus—the one who walks with us through every valley—and remind them that God is with them in their story. As they heal, encourage them to share their testimony and the Gospel as a way of reminding themselves and others of the hope we have in Jesus.
